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Rules That Will Keep Your Ministry Alive

by James McKenzie

  1. Regulate every significant other to second place.
  2. Learn how to love. Flirt with any infant available.
  3. Develop a reverence for your own impulses,            and be suspicious of your behavior sequences.
  4. Enjoy your spouse more than your kids, and be childish with your mate.
  5. Fracture role structures at will and repeatedly.
  6. Learn to retreat and advance from every position you take.
  7. Guard your impotence as one of your most valuable weapons.
  8. Build long-term relations so that you will be             free to hate safely.
  9. Face the fact that you must grow until you die. Develop a sense of the benign absurdity of life - yours and those around you - and thus learn to transcend the world of experience. If we can abandon our missionary zeal we have less chance of being eaten by cannibals.
  10. Develop your primary-process living. Evolve a joint craziness with someone you are safe with.  Structure a professional cuddle group so you won't abuse your mate with garbage left over from the day's work.
  11. As Plato said, "Practice dying."